How Building Character and Virtues Increases Happiness

Hey, I’m Paul Krismer. I’m your happiness expert and this week, I am coming to you from a very unusual, undisclosed, top secret location where the American military are planning operations. You know, it’s camping. It’s been rainy, it’s been wet, it’s been loud, with mortar explosions all the kind of things that you just go, “Wow, I didn’t sign up for all of this.” And yet, despite the certain challenges to it, it’s been a lot of fun. I’ve been learning a ton and one of the things I kind of wanted to talk about with all of you this week is that, in spite of all the challenges, and political and sociological challenges that come with military operations, much of which I deeply question at times, there’s something fundamentally beautiful about military culture. And that is this deliberate intention to teach character, to build character in the young soldiers who spend years of their lives in these kinds of operations. And so, this video is about character and its relationship to happiness. So, stay tuned.

As a coach, public speaker, and best-selling author, I teach topics just like this one all around the world. So, stay tuned and I’ll give you practical tools that you can use to make both yourself and those around you both happier and more successful. So, thousands of years ago, Aristotle said happiness is the end purpose and meaning of human existence, which is a fascinating reflection. And I think over many years, it seemed like merely a philosophical idea that happiness and virtue, virtuous character, are related. But not really something that we could profoundly take to the bank and believe to be true. But, in the last 30 years, much science, practical research, has been done on this very question of is there a relationship between having virtuous character and having a good life. In a moment-to-moment perspective of happiness, as a smile on your face and a feeling of that dopamine rushing pleasure, virtue and happiness have no relationship. But, in a deeper, more meaningful sense of “Have I lived a happy life?” virtuous characters is everything. And it can be its own very direct, intentional pursuit of the good life, the happy life, the life worth living. It cannot be measured in moments or days but instead a reflection of some point of perspective, and looking back through the course of years and maybe decades, and maybe in our old age a whole lifetime, and saying, “Did I grow in character? Did I become a better human being?” And, if so, our contentment, our satisfaction, the richness of our life, it can be weighed in a way that is deeply gratifying and happy making. This research on living virtuously, it isn’t frivolous. It shows that when we have characteristics of fair-mindedness, perspective, forgiveness, a lot of virtuous characters, those in and of themselves make us more content, well-beings.

Again, in this military setting, where they’re deliberately training a culture of having good character, it’s an interesting thing. Because, no other organizations that I know of, except maybe religious institutions, have an intention to build character. And they’re very deliberate about it here. And sometimes it comes down to things that feel superficially trivial. You know, there’s all kinds of standards of appearance. And we could say, “Well, who cares? Does virtue really come from being clean shaven?” And no, it doesn’t. Categorically, it does not. But, if you’re trying to say there’s a way of demonstrating respectfulness and cleanliness as part of the military culture, because it creates honorable people, you can see this deliberate intention. And anything that’s institutionalized has mistakes. It’s human. But, the goal, the intention, is not a mistake. And it’s far more than how we appear. It’s how we respectfully address one another. That we treat everyone with dignity and respect.

And there’s great research, primarily led by Martin Seligman and colleagues of his, and they created what’s called the VIA Character Strengths Assessment, and the Institute of Character. And they deliberately walk through how character leads to greater happiness. And you can do for free a very simple assessment that, if you pay more, you get a more deeper analysis of your own character. Showing how people have certain virtuous character strengths that they primarily lead with. And usually, I say to people, “Don’t pay much attention to your weaknesses when it comes to personal development.” But, when it comes to virtues, it’s quite illuminating to see where we’re weakest and where we’re strongest. So we can lean into the virtues that that we’re already skilled at and be at least consciously aware of places that we maybe aren’t as strong as some other people. So that we can, with self-forgiveness and gentleness, work on some of our our weaker virtues.

And the VIA Character Strengths has been lumps virtues. And there’s 24 of them in total, but they kind of categorize them as five fundamental, core ways in which we make ourselves better people: wisdom, and a bunch of individual characteristics that fall under this broad category of wisdom; courage, with a bunch of important virtues that fall under this idea of courage; then humanity and justice, the way we connect at a societal level with other people; then temperance, our own personal self-governance; and then finally transcendence, the way that we move beyond our egos and become people who can be light where there is otherwise darkness. It’s a beautiful subject. It’s a beautiful way of viewing happiness.

And this opportunity I’ve had here this past several days, although character strengths have not been hitting me in the face day in day out, that underlying theme, that that’s part of what drives the military ethic is that we create honorable, virtuous people, has been beautiful. And if y’all have any desire in your own heart to create more virtues, it’s worth contemplating people who make the ultimate sacrifice, giving up their weekends, their days, their years of their lives to serve their country, and to protect peace and democracy, and the values that that some countries hold true. There’s a lot to be said for here, people expressing these wonderful, virtuous strengths. So, if you like this kind of content, click the like button, share it with your friends and family. Thanks for watching. See you again next week. Bye for now.